Monday, January 28, 2008

4 Year Olds Suck!

I swear this kid is going to be the death of me. Nope, not talking about Alex this time. It's Max. He has been running so hot and cold lately I don't know which way is up. He desperately wants to wear underwear to bed but he keeps having accidents because he sneaks into the bathroom after we go downstairs and drinks water. I don't mind changing sheets, but this is getting old. He knows he gets a TV in his room when he can last a week, but he doesn't seem to want it very badly, I guess.

And that's just the beginning. He's been acting up at preschool too. We all know he's a very active child, but aside from being hyper, he's usually pretty good there. Last week we got a note sent home saying that he had grabbed scissors from another child and stabbed at them with it. Not only that, but later the same day he had to go back to the office because he was out of control not listening. Today they mentioned that he was uncooperative and wouldn't keep his hands to himself. I ask him daily if there is something there to make him unhappy. Does he like his teachers? Yes! Do you want to keep going? Yes! What don't you like? Cullen! Cullen is a little boy Max's age that makes fun of UofM all the time. Only makes sense when we live in the land of Notre Dame. Max thinks Cullen is mean. But instead of ignoring him and playing with other kids, he lets it get to him and gets himself into trouble. Odd though, his incidents with other kids never involve the one person he doesn't like. Hmmm? I don't get it.

Anyway, he has been acting up more at home too. Part of me thinks its jealousy. Alex has been so needy lately with teething, his ear infection, and just being the age that he's at. I don't know how to explain that to Max, but I'm sure he feels slighted. He acts up to get attention (I did the same thing as a teenager) but it only causes me to get angry and yell rather than sitting and talking with him or doing something with him so he doesn't feel slighted. Then when I have time to think about it later, I just feel like a shitty mom. This parenting thing is so much harder than I ever could have imagined. And surprise of all surprises, Tim is amazing and can redirect Max so easily. Why don't I have that ability?

Anyway, tonight was no different. I sat and watched The Wizard of Oz with him after I put Alex to bed. We had a nice time and some little talks about bad dreams and how they aren't real. He was so good and I really enjoyed the time. Tim came home in plenty of time to do story and bedtime so I told Max we would both read to him. Then bedtime came. I told him to go upstairs and brush his teeth. When he was done we would watch TV in my room until Tim got out of the shower. He threw a tantrum, didn't listen, and whined uncontrollably. I thought I might go insane. Tim got out of the shower in time to help, but Max worked himself into a corner and was told he didn't get books at all. His whining then got him tossed in bed with the door closed and he hadn't brushed his teeth yet. The problem there, we told him, to get him to brush his teeth, that they would rot out if he didn't brush every night. He freaked from his room that he didn't want his teeth to fall out. I waited until he calmed down and went and talked with him. He finally got to brush his teeth and then Tim came in and we did more family talk. I hope we got through to him, but I'm sure it won't last. I just feel so helpless sometimes not knowing what to do or say to help him.

I do think a huge part of his problem is lack of sleep. At preschool they wake the kids at 2 if they aren't up on their own before then. Max doesn't do so well being woken up. Plus, he doesn't go down early enough to get the two hours that he needs. He has also had a very off schedule week staying up too late most nights. Top that off with the fact that he either wakes at 5 to go to the bathroom, or wakes at 5 because he wet the bed. He doesn't go back to sleep anymore when this occurs like he did when he was younger. Tim and I decided that from now on, Tim will wake him to go potty when he goes to bed. That way hopefully Max will get into the habit of going in the middle of the night and go back to sleep, maybe sleeping in longer. In general, he does not do well when he's tired. Add all the other stuff to it and it makes for a monster child who's mommy can't deal.

I'm thinking we should pick a day, sometime soon, when Tim is off and I don't have to work the night before to have Max's day. A day where we can do whatever he wants, get some extra sleep, and be with mommy and daddy alone without Alex always needing something. I just hope that sort of schedule comes up soon. I hate to have him think he's entitled to stuff like that, but given how good he had been doing, we need to do something to get him back on track.

Ahh, it feels good to get all of that out. Now I'm exhausted and I want to go to sleep. Too bad I have to work in less than 2 hours and I leave in about an hour. Guess I'll go relax for a bit, but I'm sure I'll be around again soon!

2 comments:

manda said...

Sounds like you have your hands full. I think a mommy and max day could be very beneficial. I know somedays Trev just needs a hour with mommy or daddy and hes good for a while.

Debbie said...

I totally agree that it could be sleep depravation! That happens to Caige if we let him stay up on the weekends, he is horrid until he catches up.

Hang in there mama ;)